I love fitness and athletics centred reality shows, those were a group of people in better shape and with more acrobatic capabilities than I will ever have compete by attempting […]
I love fitness and athletics centred reality shows, those were a group of people in better shape and with more acrobatic capabilities than I will ever have compete by attempting to clear a course so intense I feel muscles tearing just from listening to the descriptions.
Ninja Warrior is pretty cool and is perhaps the most well-known of this genre, but as of last year I have a new favourite show and it’s the Netflix original, Stallone produced Ultimate Beastmaster. What sets it apart are a few things:
There are 108 competitors from 6 different countries.
Each episode sees 12 participants go at it, with 2 per country. Each episode crowns a Beastmaster and then the finale sees all 9 masters compete against one another in a souped-up version of the course for the title of Ultimate Beastmaster and a serious amount of cash.
Each country has its own announcing team and while Netflix focuses on the Americans for the most part, one of the joys of the Ultimate Beastmaster is watching the shenanigans they all get around to. Season 2 has French and Italian announcers and the rivalry between them almost made me choke from laughter.
Over Christmas and New Years’ Eve, after watching the second season of Ultimate Beastmaster I wondered how video game characters would fare against the savage courses of the beast, so I decided to find out. After all, they kept referring to the course as some form of live-action video game. This is my own little version of a fantasy league, with a set of game characters competing for the title of beastmaster. Each week we’ll put more characters to the test, for the glory of it.
For the first week, I’ll nominate the characters myself, based on the following rules. But for the rest of the season, it’s my hope you’ll help me come up with a list of worthy candidates for the title of Ultimate Video Game Beastmaster.
The rules for character are as follows:
A character has access to all skills from across all their appearances. For example: Mario would have the combined skills of all of his appearances in video games.
Abilities behave just as they do in the game. Example: Genji from Overwatch can quickly climb to the top of an obstacle, but he can’t hang from it or shimmy.
Using abilities to skip parts of the course is forbidden.
The Beast consists of Four Levels and these are the skills required for them, to help you make your choice. Some characters will have skills that grant them a significant advantage with a given obstacle. For example, Kratos from God of War has a significant advantage on walls, due to his wall climbing abilities. Where other characters can climb ledges and shimmy across them, which helps move across a wall, Kratos can move across such a surface efficiently.
To avoid confusion, here’s a basic definition for each of the major skills:
Climbing: Vertical movement only. Includes ladders, ropes, ledges, handholds.
Ledge Shimmy: Horizontal movement only.
Wall Climbing: Free movement across a wall, horizontally and vertically.
Jumping: high and long jumps. Includes running start where available.
Rope Swinging: Can increase/generate momentum while hanging. Includes ropes, trapeze, hanging wheels.
Level 1:
Bite Force: Walking, running.
Grinder: Jumping, climbing (optional)
Energy Coils: Jumping.
Long jumps with minimal running start grants an advantage.
Dead Bolts: Climbing, Jumping, Ledge Shimmying.
Rope Swinging grants an advantage.
Mag Wall: Climbing, Ledge Shimmying.
Wall Climbing grants a big advantage.
Level 2
Spinal Ascent: Jumping, Climbing
Spinal Descent: N/A (completion assumed)
Point Thruster: Ledge Shimmying/ledge hold.
Stomach Churn: Jumping
Digestive Track: Crouching, running, climbing.
Dreadmills: running & jumping.
Chain Reaction: climbing.
Rope swinging grants big advantage.
Vertebrace: jumping, climbing, Ledge shimmying.
Level 3
Ejector: Completion assumed, even though many fail at this.
Prism Strike: Ledge Shimmying, jump.
Coil Crawl: Ledge Shimmy, Climbing.
Hangman: Ledge Shimmy/Hold, Climb.
Pipeline: Ledge shimmy.
Wall: Climb.
Wall Climbing grants advantage.
Level 4
Ricochet: Climb, Jump.
Wall jumps grant advantage.
Full Tilt: Ledge Shimmy.
Motherboard: Climbing.
Wall Climbing grants advantage.
Sky Hook: Ledge Shimmying
Rope Swinging grants advantage.
Ventilator: Climbing
Wall jumping grants advantage.
Note that these requirements are merely guidelines and characters may combine their skills to overcome situations. Even if a character can’t shimmy, he may find a way through by using his other skills.
With the rules and the levels explained, it’s time to meet the first round of gaming Athletes. Note that for further weeks, character from the same franchise may be chosen, as long as they haven’t already participated.
Mario – Super Mario Bros. series
Kain – Legacy of Kain series
Mega Man X – Mega Man X series
Genji – Overwatch
Aloy – Horizon: Zero Dawn
Lara Croft (LAU) – Tomb Raider series
Jill Valentine – Resident Evil series
Hayato – Shadow Tactics: Blades of the Shogun
Catwoman – Batman Arkham Series
Link – The Legend of Zelda series
Bayonetta – Bayonetta series
Faith Connors – Mirror’s Edge series
Be sure to come back next week to hear how these twelve gaming superstars did when they faced the Beast, and once we crown a beast master among them, it’ll be time to look at the next set of contestants!
Live from the Mushroom Kingdom, he’s done it all, now he’s here to conquer the Beast!
He’s conquered Nosgoth, now he’ll bring the beast to heel.
Representing Overwatch, the green cyborg ninja dude!
She’s used to fighting mechanical monstrosities, the beast is no exception!
She’s here for the grand prize, even if she doesn’t win it legally!
You’d be surprised how much she can do with that hair!
Parkour experts are no strangers to Ultimate Beastmaster, Faith is here to show everyone how it’s done!
She’ll do her best not to end up a Jill sandwich!
A veteran among the competitors, she’s here to prove she’s still got it!
Once upon a time, he was a man of many tools, but he’s been working out lately.
He once used his skills for assassination, now he wants to test himself!
I’ve got one more slightly out-there suggestion, by the way: Rufus from Street Fighter. He’s a big dude, but he’s hella acrobatic – he doesn’t look like most of the very lean competitors seen on the show, but I think he could show them up with his crazy speed.
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I’ll add him to the list and check his skills.
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I will also create some conversion rules for fighting game characters. After all, they’re sure to lack some of the athletic skills action/adventure characters possess
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I don’t have any particularly great character ideas, but I’ll certainly look forward to seeing the first match! I’ll be rooting for my boy Link, though something tells me he may be outclassed in this particular competition.
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The funny thing is that before Breath of the Wild, you might’ve been right. But after that game, which gave Link such athletic prowess, he might just make it through!
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Nathan drake from uncharted would make a good candidate
Now this I am looking forward to!
I’ve got one more slightly out-there suggestion, by the way: Rufus from Street Fighter. He’s a big dude, but he’s hella acrobatic – he doesn’t look like most of the very lean competitors seen on the show, but I think he could show them up with his crazy speed.
I’ll add him to the list and check his skills.
I will also create some conversion rules for fighting game characters. After all, they’re sure to lack some of the athletic skills action/adventure characters possess
I don’t have any particularly great character ideas, but I’ll certainly look forward to seeing the first match! I’ll be rooting for my boy Link, though something tells me he may be outclassed in this particular competition.
The funny thing is that before Breath of the Wild, you might’ve been right. But after that game, which gave Link such athletic prowess, he might just make it through!
Nathan drake from uncharted would make a good candidate